Tanya Michaels - [4 Seasons 01] - Mistletoe Baby p.03

Chapter Twelve
A houseful of laughing women was the complete opposite of the quiet, complicated intimacy of the night before, when David had returned to cook Rachel
chicken and pasta. Tonight’s dinner was Chinese takeout. Arianne had ordered enough to feed an entire sorority house.
Since Rachel and David’s house was larger than Arianne’s garage apartment or either half of Lilah and Quinn’s duplex, the women had agreed to meet
here for the Bubble Party. At the reception, before the bride and groom’s departure, attendants would hand small decorated bottles of bubbles to each
guest. The catch was, someone actually had to decorate three hundred clear plastic bottles in the appropriate wedding colors. With Tanner and Lilah both
having spent most of their lives in Mistletoe, they’d invited the majority of the town.
Rachel had carefully hidden her scrapbook materials, and the entire bridal party except Vonda (who was hoping to hit a jackpot on a seniors’ trip to the
Biloxi casinos) gathered at six-thirty. While the glue guns heated up, the women gorged themselves on mu shu pork, beef with broccoli, shrimp lo mein
and egg rolls. Afterward, they formed an assembly line in the living room, wedding-themed movies playing in the background for ambiance.
By the time Nia Vardalos and John Corbett had overcome cultural obstacles and meddling family in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, one heart-shaped
basket was already full of completed bottles of bubbles. Halfway through Father of the Bride, Arianne got up to dig out the corkscrew from the back of a
kitchen drawer. She’d brought over two bottles of wine from a Georgia vineyard.
“Okay, what can I pour anybody?” she asked, standing at the edge of the living room.
“The white merlot for me,” Quinn said.
“Chardonnay, please.” Lilah affected a reprimanding scowl. “But when the tiny green bows end up crooked on these bubbles, you’re going to have to
explain to my wedding guests it’s because you plied us with alcohol.”
“Fair enough,” Arianne said. “What about you, Rach?”
Rachel kept her gaze on the piece of lace in her hand. “I’m good, but thanks.”
“You sure?” Arianne persisted. “It’s from that family winery in Dahlonega you love.”
“Yeah, but I’ve almost hot-glued my fingers together twice. Friends don’t let friends drink and glue. Maybe later.” Like in six and a half months.
An hour or so later, as Arianne popped a rented copy of The Wedding Singer into the DVD player, Quinn stretched and regretfully announced that she
didn’t think she could stay much longer.
“I have to be at school at seven tomorrow to administer some makeup tests before winter break and the end of the grading period.” She shot an
apologetic look at the bride. Since the two friends lived in adjoining houses, they’d driven over together. “I hate to cut the evening short.”
“Are you kidding? We’ve already decorated, like, two hundred and eighty bottles.” Lilah looked tickled pink by the progress. “You guys are amazing.”
“I can stick around and help for a little longer,” Arianne volunteered.
Rachel managed not to wince—she’d actually been hoping everyone would go and that she could shuffle off to bed. “That’s sweet, but you don’t have to. I
can easily finish the few that are left tomorrow.”
“Okay.” Ari agreed readily enough, but stared at her for a moment as if she had more to say. She bided her time, though, until after the other women had
left.
Rachel was stacking all the movies by Arianne’s purse when her sister-in-law asked from behind her, “So when are you due?”
“What?” Rachel jumped. “How—Why—Why would you…?”
Arianne rolled her eyes, but her grin was a mile wide. “Oh, that was a convincing denial.” She suddenly squealed, throwing her arms around Rachel’s
shoulders. “I am so excited for you!”
Rachel blinked back tears. Even though it hadn’t been the plan, it felt pretty amazing to share the news with someone close to her. “Thank you.”
“Now go sit your pregnant butt down and tell me everything!”
“Um, other than what you’ve already surmised, I’m not sure what else there is to know.”
“Well, for starters, when are you due?” Arianne repeated. “When did you find out? Did you set up an elaborate romantic scene to tell David, or did you just
kind of blurt it out because you were so excited or did he already suspect or—”
“Whoa. One question at a time. We haven’t known for very long at all. David was with me when I took the home pregnancy test. We got the results
confirmed by the doctor, but we were waiting to tell people. Obviously.”
“I don’t think that’s gonna work out. No offense, but you and David don’t have poker faces. When I went to lunch with the two of you the other day, I knew
something was up. For one thing, whenever one of you thought the other wasn’t looking, you were staring at each other.”
Rachel felt her face heat. “We were?”
“Oh, yeah. He was in such a great mood, too. But he’s also been tense lately. I get it now. He must be really happy but maybe worried about you and the
baby all at the same time. Is everything all right?”
“So far. I mean, I’ve had a few dizzy spells, some nausea. Dr. McDermott assured us all that was normal. And I’ve been tired.”
“We noticed. You were practically falling asleep over your craft scissors, then you refused a glass of one of your favorite wines.”
“We noticed?”
Arianne bobbed her head. “I asked Lilah and Quinn if they thought you’d been feeling all right lately, and Lilah mentioned that you’d seemed less than a
hundred percent shopping the other day. She also said that you asked them to stop the car because you had to go to the bathroom every five minutes.
The way David was hovering at the shower and all that food he brought you? I think everyone suspects, but we didn’t want to…”
“Get your hopes up?” Rachel asked, knowing that Arianne was treading lightly because of what had happened last time.
“So when are you going to tell the family? You can’t wait until the second trimester—everyone will have figured it out by then!”
She made a valid point. Rachel sighed. “I don’t know. I’ll have to talk it over with David.”
Arianne was grinning from ear to ear again. “I am going to be the coolest aunt ever. No offense to Lilah or your sister, but come on. This is me we’re
talking about.”
Rachel experienced a twinge of guilt. Even though it hadn’t been intentional, she felt bad that one of David’s family knew about the baby and he hadn’t
been part of the announcement. He would have wanted to share in the moment.
“I know you’ll be a fantastic aunt. You’ve always been a fantastic sister-in-law,” Rachel said with feeling. “But right now, there’s something I need you to do
for me as a friend. Well, two things.”
“Yes?”
“First, keep it just between us?”
“You got it—it’ll be our little secret!”
Yours, mine, David’s, Mindy’s, May’s, Dr. McDermott and her entire staff… Chloe, Quinn and Lilah had probably all figured it out, too.
“Second.” Rachel rubbed her eyes. “Any chance I could convince you to clear out of here so that I can drop into an eight-hour coma?”
Arianne laughed. “Deal. I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?”
Once Rachel had the house to herself, she brushed her teeth and changed into a silky, oversize sleep shirt that buttoned down the front. In the darkness,
she climbed into bed, but her conscience nagged that there was something she should do before she let herself sink into slumber. After only a minute or
two of deliberation, she reached for the cordless phone.
Would he be asleep? It was a few minutes past eleven, and David liked to be up with the sun.
He answered on only the second ring, sounding plenty alert. “Rach? Is that you?”
“Hey. Sorry for calling at this hour.”
“You can call anytime. Is everything all right?”
“Absolutely. No problems today. But…something happened tonight that you should know about.”
“All right.” From his end, there came rustling and a click. Rachel imagined him sitting up, turning on the light and bracing himself for whatever news she
might have.
“It’s nothing bad,” she reiterated. “Your sister caught me off guard.”
He snorted. “Ari has a way of doing that.”
“We were all over here working on party favors for the wedding, and after Quinn and Lilah left, Arianne asked me point-blank about being pregnant. I didn’t
mean to tell her, but I didn’t deny it convincingly.”
“You’re a very honest person,” he said, his voice laced with affection. “So my sister knows?”
“She said she won’t tell anyone, but I figured now that the cat’s out of the bag, it would only be right to let the rest of your family know. Soon.”
“Christmas is right around the corner. Why not tell them Christmas morning?”
She smiled at the idea. “That sounds festive. With the big announcement as backup, I won’t have to worry about whether your family will like their
presents.”
He chuckled. “Oh, come on. They’ll love whatever you got them because it was from you.”
She picked at the fringe on the edge of her bedspread. Their bedspread. “Actually, I did all right shopping for most of your family, but…”
“But?” he prompted.
“I was at a loss as to what I should get you. Everything seemed either hypocritical or too impersonal.” When he didn’t say anything, she couldn’t help
asking, “Didn’t you have trouble picking something out for me?”
“No.”
“Oh. Well, I—”
“Rachel, it doesn’t matter. It’s the thought that counts, and I…Really, it doesn’t matter.” His voice lowered. “There’s only one thing I want, anyway. You.”
Her breath stuck in her throat, her skin tingling at the intensity in his voice. She was suddenly, miraculously, not the least bit tired. You, he’d said—not the
baby, not another chance at their marriage, simply you.
“I…” Maybe it was a surge of hormones, maybe it was old-fashioned lust, but she couldn’t turn away from what she was feeling. Not this time. Didn’t she
want to be that bold woman who went after what she wanted, a woman who wouldn’t cower away from making love with the lights blazing?
“Last night?” she prompted. “When you were leaving after dinner, I really wanted you to kiss me. And when we said goodbye after shopping with Tanner
and Lilah. And when you picked me up for shopping with Tanner and Lilah. I should have just taken action.”
Now she heard his breathing hitch as he fumbled for words. It was a delicious sensation.
“Give me five minutes.”
PLEASE don’t let her change her mind, please don’t let her change her mind. David shoved his arms through the sweatshirt he’d discarded earlier and
took the steps two at a time toward the front door. Part of him thought it would be quicker just to sprint toward the house—the way he felt now, he could
make it in twenty seconds flat—than mess with the car, but then he’d show up sweaty and panting. That was only romantic under certain very specific
conditions.
What is it you think is going to happen? he asked himself as he turned the key in the ignition. So she’d admitted to wanting to kiss him. That didn’t
necessarily translate to…
But instead of listening to what was probably the voice of reason, he focused on thinking positively. He let himself dwell on the way she’d responded when
he’d kissed her over a week ago. Such heat. It had to mean she missed him at least a little. And what about the way she’d looked at him during their
dinner with Lilah and Tanner, and her request yesterday that he hold her? He couldn’t help believing that things between him and Rachel were shifting for
the better.
Pulling into the driveway, he barely had the engine shut off before he flung open the door. Now what, Einstein? Did he approach this casually, asking if he
could come inside so they could talk about what she’d said? Or did he just plant one on her, not giving her the chance to take back her rash admission,
and hope for the best?
The porch light was on, probably a holdover from the ladies’ visit earlier, but there was no visible illumination from inside the house. He stood in the pale
orange glow and rapped against his own front door.
It swung open immediately, his wife smiling up at him from the shadows. “What took you so long?”
A streak of pure need jolted through his body. “Rachel.”
That was all he got out before he reached for her, pulling her into his arms where she belonged. His mouth fell on hers, and she kissed him back fervently.
She tugged on his hair as if trying to bring him closer. He was happy to oblige.
It wasn’t until a gust of particularly frigid December wind hit them that they both realized their front door was standing wide-open. He shoved it closed and
turned the dead bolt. The good news was, they’d been in the dark foyer and there were unlikely to be many witnesses at this time of night anyway.
Within seconds, he’d turned back to Rachel, but apparently it had been enough time for her to go. His heart pounded an anxious drumbeat as he
struggled to read the situation. Had she suddenly had misgivings, or was she simply awaiting him in their bedroom? As if in response to his questions, a
thin ray of light appeared, beckoning him toward the living room.
She was at the sofa, leaning one knee on it without really sitting.
He said the first thing that came to mind. “You’re beautiful.”
She blessed him with an ageless smile, full of feminine secrets. “I feel beautiful.”
Her fingers flirted with the button at the top of her shirt, and David suspected that he would die on the spot. Except that, if he did, he’d never get to make
love to Rachel again.
He approached her slowly, curious, not wanting to rush her or take charge of the seduction. As he’d climbed out of his car, he’d been trying to decide on
the best plan of action here. Why hadn’t it occurred to him that Rachel might have her own plans?
Mesmerized by the slow slide of the button from its buttonhole, he stopped inches from her. A second button followed, revealing the creamy swell of her
breasts. He had to touch her.
He rested his thumb over the third. “May I?”
She nodded, her eyes echoing the urgency he felt. His fingers actually shook as he unbuttoned the shirt and parted the satiny folds of material. Her
breasts were so full, their centers darker than he remembered. It made him crazy that her body had started changing with pregnancy and he’d already
missed some of it.
Recalling what she’d discussed with the doctor, he asked, “Are they too tender?”
She arched toward him. “Only one way to find out, I guess.”
Keeping his touch featherlight, he trailed two fingers over the slope of her left breast, slowing so that it took forever to reach the tightly puckered nipple.
“That hurt?”
Wordless, Rachel shook her head. He wanted to smile, but his entire body was humming with arousal. Still, he focused his concentration on being gentle,
bringing her pleasure. He slid the fabric off her shoulders, glancing down to take in the sight of his wife wearing only a pair of pink panties. For just a
moment, he slid his hands down over her rib cage to her waist, then back up to her breasts. When he moved to lay her back on the couch and lavish her
with more attention, she frowned, tugging instead at his shirt. He struggled free, glad for the sudden cool air against his skin. It might be December
outside, but it was an inferno here.
Rachel placed a palm against his chest and gave him that smile again, the one he felt down to his toes. He sat, helping steady her with his hands as she
straddled his lap. The urge to bury himself inside her, to reclaim what was his, was overwhelming. But he hadn’t touched her in weeks—hadn’t truly
explored her in months—and he refused to deny either of them the experience.
Reaching up, he cupped her breasts together, still gentle but merciless in his attention, running his thumbs over the peaks, bringing her close enough to
his mouth to suckle. When she cried out, he had to double-check that he hadn’t caused her any discomfort.
“No,” she assured him. “More.” Her voice sounded exactly like the woman he’d once thought he knew as well as himself, but also not. It was a dizzying,
exotic contrast.
He continued to use his tongue and lips against her sensitive flesh, and she bucked in his lap. Edging one finger beneath the band of her panties, he
found her slick and ready for him. Having been pushed to exquisite, excruciating limits, he yanked down the combined waist-bands of his pants and
boxers. She braced one hand on the sofa back for balance while she shimmied out of her own underwear and he sat paralyzed, absorbed in the sheer joy
of watching her, the warm light of the end-table lamp bathing her lush curves in gold. She looked like a decadent, pagan treasure. His treasure.
Kissing her again, he slid her across his thighs, so close now that all rational thought fractured and flew. Meshing his hands in her hair, he angled her head
back, wanting to look into her eyes as he thrust upward and impaled her. For just a second, their gazes were locked together as intimately as their
bodies. Then she leaned forward, rocking in a rhythm that quickly doubled and grew frantic. Fingers clutched on slippery skin and half-formed words of
carnal praise were traded breathlessly.
She called out his name, one of the few coherent things either of them managed, just as her muscles constricted around him. Feeling like an exile finally
home, David tightened his embrace and lost himself inside her.
Chapter Thirteen
They lay together stretched out on the couch for some time, dozing but neither of them falling asleep for long. David idly massaged the small of Rachel’s
back, which she seemed to like, judging from the occasional sighs.
He kissed the top of her head. “I don’t think you told me—what actually tipped Ari off about the baby?”
“A combination of a couple of different things. A biggie seemed to be our lunch with her the other day. She said it was obvious there was something we
weren’t telling her.”
The comment lodged under his skin like a splinter. He and Rachel had definitely been keeping secrets, and not only the happy news of the pregnancy. As
for the other? It was probably impolitic to ask where they stood relationship-wise while he still had her naked against him. They’d dragged an afghan over
their bodies as their temperatures dropped back to normal, but neither of them had bothered to dress. Just being around Rachel when she was this
uninhibited made him want her again.
Would she expect him to stay the night, or would taking a step that gargantuan be overkill? Despite himself, he grinned. After what they’d just shared, it
was hard to imagine anything else being seen as too much, too soon. “I hate to leave you, but I guess I should get back to the dogs.”
She nodded. “I suppose that’s the responsible thing to do.”
He felt around for various pieces of clothing while she watched, her expression inscrutable. “Rach, I can’t tell you how glad I am that you called.”
She shot him a smile so wicked it was probably illegal in fifteen states. “Well, you kept saying that if there was anything I needed…”
He laughed out loud, a tremendous weight off his chest. For the first time all year, he felt deep down in his soul that they were going to be okay. It would
take work, and it wouldn’t happen overnight, but they were going to be okay.
His mother was right—this was the season of miracles.
WHITE ROSES awaited Rachel when she walked into work on Wednesday morning.
May nodded toward them with an approving grin. “Someone loves you.”
The words gave Rachel warm fuzzies. All morning, though, the quick pulses of joy were followed by nervousness. When she’d suggested to David in
November that they go their separate ways, she’d been almost numb. Even he, by tacit admission and his total lack of protest, had acknowledged how
much their relationship had deteriorated. Now…Last night had been like regaining feeling in a frostbitten extremity. Along with the extreme pleasure he’d
brought her, he’d awakened a dormant pain. Because, for the first time in a long time, she truly realized how much she had to lose.
She made herself wait half an hour, rather than give in to her eager impulse to call him. Instead, she contacted Belle Fulton with some bids she’d put
together for the chamber of commerce, then helped May organize a promotional calendar for the coming new year, with seasonally themed discounts and
specials. The entire time, David was at the back of her mind, patiently waiting.
Her fingers shook as she dialed the number she knew by heart, and she smiled wryly. Where was the brazen woman who’d slowly stripped for her
husband the night before? Had he guessed that when she reached for that first button, part of her had been petrified? It had been so worth it, though.
She’d felt glorious, powerful, cherished.
“Waide Supply. David Waide speaking.”
“Hey. This is Rachel Waide speaking.”
She could feel him smile into the phone. “Hey, gorgeous. I was just thinking about you. Of course, that’s because I haven’t stopped thinking about you
since I left last night.”
“Glad to know I made an impression.” She glanced around, making sure May was busy and out of earshot, then lowered her voice. “So, I was thinking.”
“Go on,” he encouraged. “It worked out really well the last time you called me to share your thoughts.”
She laughed, but the nervousness that had been dogging her expanded sharply in her lungs—like when you take too deep a breath in really cold air.
“David, last night was wonderful, but it might have been a bit…pre-mature. We might have moved a little fast.”
“I was really hoping this conversation was going to go differently,” he said, forlorn.
“But I liked the direction we were moving in,” she added. “I thought maybe we could, um, date for a little while? I know, you probably think it sounds stupid,
but—”
“It sounds a whole hell of a lot better than losing you,” he said emphatically.
Relief coursed through her. “In that case, I ordered two tickets to the Winter Wonderland Dance. What are you doing Friday night?”
INSTEAD OF falling into the family business, Tanner Waide had struck out on his own. He ran a small but steadily growing bookkeeping service out of his
apartment. In fact, despite what Lilah and Tanner conveniently let their parents and guardians believe until after the wedding, David suspected that
makeshift office was about the only purpose the apartment served anymore. During work hours, when Lilah was at the school, Tanner could almost always
be found here.
David knocked, more relieved than he would have expected when his brother called out, “Just a sec!”
A moment later, the door swung wide. “Dave, hey. Come on in, but watch your step. My lease is up at the end of the month, and it’s a maze of boxes in
here.”
“I see that.” The little one-bedroom had never been much to look at, but with so many of Tanner’s personal belongings already packed, the place was
dingier than usual. Was this Mistletoe’s answer to a bachelor pad? He shuddered, wondering how close he’d come to a future that looked like this.
“What’s up?” Tanner asked.
David sat on the lumpy orange sofa the landlord had thrown in with the deposit of the first and last month’s rent. “I came by to see if you wanted to grab
lunch, but maybe it’s better if we talk where no friendly neighbors can overhear us. I need to ask your help with something.”
“My help? Wow, knock me over with a feather.”
David raised an eyebrow. “Let me know when you’re done making jokes.”
“What makes you think I was joking?” Tanner dumped some haphazardly stacked CDs out of a blue milk crate, flipped it over and sat on the plastic cube.
“Don’t keep me in suspense. What do you need?”
Covert help with furniture assembly, but the simple request didn’t spill out.
Instead, David stumbled over the urge to blurt out everything that had happened for the past month and get his brother’s relationship advice now that he’d
been gifted with a second chance. But, aside from the fact he and Rachel had agreed not to discuss that with his family, David wasn’t sure he was even
capable of that conversation—admitting that he had made such a hash of his marriage that his wife had left.
Why was this so hard? Everyone—Tanner, Ari, their mother—had made it clear they’d be willing to listen, to provide any kind of support that was in their
power. Yet, even with a close-knit family, David didn’t make a practice of turning to others for help. By the time he was in fifth grade, he hadn’t needed
assistance with homework and by the time he’d hit middle school he’d been earning extra money as a peer tutor. He’d never had his heart broken as a
teenager, had never had to worry about finding a job and had been blessed with a college scholarship. Even when it came to the kids’ soccer teams, he
was one of the coaches able to manage without an assistant when they didn’t have volunteers. What his mother had said to him a few weeks ago was
true: You were the solution finder.
Were being the operative word. He was not only beginning to realize there was nothing wrong with occasionally leaning on others, he suspected that if he
didn’t start getting comfortable with that idea, he really might lose Rachel. For good. Besides, he was going to be a father. While he hoped his kid would
grow up to be self-sufficient, David wanted to set the most positive example possible—and that didn’t include being too proud to let people who loved him
lend a hand.
He waded in slowly. “Things are…awkward with Rachel. Nothing I can’t fix,” he hurried to add, mentally kicking himself for the qualifier. “What I mean is, I
think everything will be fine, but we’re in a delicate stage. I worry that a lot of times, my foot ends up in my mouth.”
Tanner laughed. “Been there a time or two myself.”
“I want to make damn sure she knows how much I love her, even if I screw up from time to time. Tanner, you can keep a secret, right? Even from Lilah.”
His brother frowned. “That wouldn’t be my first choice, but for you, yeah.”
“Rachel’s pregnant.” Just saying the words sent adrenaline through him, exhilaration building. “We’re having a baby.”
“All right!” Tanner came off the crate to clap him on the shoulder. “That is the best news I’ve heard since Lilah told me she’d marry me. Congratulations, I
am so happy for the two of you.”
“Thanks. We’re thrilled, obviously, but there are a bunch of other emotions under the surface, too.”
“I’m sure.” Tanner sobered. “You guys have been through so much. Is she worried about…well, you know?”
“Losing the baby? Whether they talk about it or not, I figure all expecting mothers probably are a tiny bit scared of that during their first trimester. Multiply
Rachel’s ‘tiny’ by a million. The doctors told her last time that it wasn’t uncommon and that an isolated miscarriage didn’t automatically increase the
chances of another one, but after the previous disappointments…Last week, during one of those awkward conversations I mentioned, she hit me with the
out-of-the-blue announcement that I handled the aftermath wrong. That I wasn’t there for her in the right way and she felt alone.”
Tanner shrugged. “She probably did. No matter how much you love her, that was something she had to suffer through in a way you’ll never experience. I
guess the best you can do under those circumstances is be patient, be there for her.”
“Yeah, it sounds so easy when you say it.” David shook his head. “We’re working to make our relationship really solid and now we have this baby coming!
I want to do something for Rachel, a special Christmas present, a grand gesture that takes her breath away and shows her how invested I am in our future
as a family. The thing is, it’s too big for me to pull off by myself. You’re pretty handy with a hammer and power drill, right?”
“I dragged you marathon shopping, and your favor includes the use of power tools?” Tanner grinned. “Man did I get the better deal.”
RACHEL KNEW it was irrational to splurge on a dress that would probably only fit for the next forty-eight hours, but she didn’t care. While it would still be
weeks before people could pass her on the street and tell she was pregnant, her body was definitely changing. Especially her breasts, which had gone up
at least a cup size since she’d taken that pregnancy test. The gown she’d chosen for tonight’s dance was a shimmering graphite material that
crisscrossed over her chest, accented by a slim band of rhinestones and hematite beading, and made the most of her ample cleavage. It fell away from
the bodice in a gracefully flowing skirt that didn’t cling in any unflattering places. A warm but sophisticated black wrap would keep her from freezing when
she was outside.
She’d just finished curling her hair when she heard the doorbell promptly at seven. David looked positively yummy in a blue dress shirt, black blazer and
slacks.
“Hi.” He smiled down into her eyes, making no attempt to mask the naked hunger in his eyes. “You look stunning.”
“Thanks. You, too.”
It was silly how much energy adolescents expended on being nervous about dates that included hamburgers and a guy they’d only go out with twice
before moving on to the next crush. Tonight, Rachel had a date with the man who—if she was very lucky—she might spend the rest of her life with. She
couldn’t imagine higher stakes. As a result, she was terrified, especially since she’d previously assumed all of her dating experiences were behind her.
“By the way,” he said as he helped drape her wrap over her shoulders, “I’m having something delivered here on Monday. I’ll be here to wait for it, if that’s
okay with you. It’s during work hours, so I shouldn’t be in your way.”
“You have every right to be here. It’s your house,” she pointed out.
He opened his mouth and she could see that he wanted to correct her: our house. She wanted that, too, not just a house, but a loving home for them and
their child. Something of that magnitude was worth working for, even if it took a little time and renewed efforts.
Once they were in the car, she asked, “So, with the Wonderland dance being a town tradition, did you take dates there back in school?”
“Sort of.”
Intrigued by the hint of laughter in his tone, she waited for more. “Explanation?”
“Well, you know how crowded it always is. I’d go with a girl, we’d make sure to casually bump into her parents and my parents exactly once, then we’d
fade into the crush. And spend the rest of the night necking at Mistletoe Cove.”
“I’m shocked at you. A boy with your sterling reputation exploiting a charity event for the chance to make out with girls?”
“Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it. In fact…” He slanted a tempting sidelong glance in her direction.
“I don’t think so.” She wasn’t sure she could stop with necking. “Slowly, remember? No turbo boosters.”
“You sure?” His voice dropped to a cajoling octave. “I’d let you be in the driver’s seat.”
“I’ll bet. As I recall, you quite liked that last time.”
His grin flashed in the darkness. “So did you.”
Heat zinged through her. David Waide was flirting with her! The sensation was just as heady now as when they’d first met. More so. Then, she’d simply
been a woman in her twenties pondering where to go next with her life, and he’d been a very cute guy who’d seemed empathetic. Now, she knew them
both better, had seen the promise of how good they could be together and had looked into the abyss of how it could all go wrong.
“Rach?”
Her voice came out huskier than usual. “I think we’d better stick to well-populated areas tonight.”
“You’re undoubtedly right.”
But he sounded every bit as depressed about the decision as she was, which cheered her considerably.
FOLLOWING a wonderful date Friday evening—ending in steamy kisses on the doorstep because Rachel hadn’t trusted their combined willpower if she
invited David in—came a night out with the girls.
Since both Lilah and Tanner had agreed they didn’t want to be out partying the night before their wedding, they were holding their bachelor and
bachelorette parties the weekend prior to the ceremony. Much to Lilah’s relief, Arianne’s talk of a wild and crazy bash had been slightly exaggerated. Still,
they did drive toward Atlanta to an upscale club that featured male dancers and really, really cute waiters. One of Lilah and Quinn’s colleagues at the
school had a minivan that seated eight, so the entire bridal party and three teachers piled in to ride together. Vonda suggested before they left Mistletoe
that the women draw straws to pick a designated driver—Rachel drew admiring praise and friends for life when she volunteered.
Once at the nightclub, Vonda suggested they hit the dance floor. “Ever since the hip replacement of ’05, I’ve been a new woman!”
“Okay, but first Lilah has to put on her veil,” Arianne insisted. It was a joyfully tacky affair with blinking neon lights and a cellophane-wrapped green condom
that looked like an oversize circular jewel in the center of the headband.
A good sport, Lilah slid it on her head to the sounds of her friends laughing and clapping.
Rachel leaned in, keeping her voice to a whisper. “Make sure that thing accidentally falls off on the dance floor, and I’ll accidentally trample the heck out of
it. Sadly, I’ll have to throw it away. Inevitable party casualty.”
“Don’t tell Ari,” Lilah whispered back, “but you are definitely going to be my favorite sister-in-law.”
The club was having a retro-themed night, and Rachel had a great time joking with her friends and belting out the lyrics to songs from Abba, Blondie and
Barry White, but it didn’t quite compare to the night before, dancing to more staid holiday selections in David’s arms. Lilah unknowingly echoed that
sentiment later while they stood at the bar and waited for a couple of glasses of cold water.
“Having fun?” Rachel asked.
“A blast. Although having that one dancer come to our table…”
Rachel grinned. “Vonda certainly seemed to like him.”
“I think everyone’s having fun, and Arianne did a good job planning something naughty without completely destroying my comfort zone. I mean, the dancer
was hot, I admit.” Lilah fanned herself with one of the small square napkins. “Seriously hot. Still, the only guy I want getting that close to me is Tanner.”
“I know exactly what you mean,” Rachel assured her. All I want for Christmas is David.
Chapter Fourteen
“Have I mentioned how much I appreciate this?” David asked, studying the planks in front of him and matching them with the diagram in the instructions.
On the other side of the room where he was assembling a matching bookshelf, Tanner wiped a sleeve across his sweaty brow. “Happy to help. Although I
gotta admit, it’s not how I pictured spending my Christmas Eve. I was planning on letting Lilah catch me beneath the mistletoe. A lot.”
Both Lilah and Rachel were currently sleeping at Susan and Zachariah’s. The Waide tradition was that the whole family gathered there for Christmas Eve
and dove into presents first thing in the morning, just as they did when they were kids. Because David had told everyone he shouldn’t leave the puppy
alone all night, the women were having a slumber party in Arianne’s old room and the guys would rejoin them around sunrise. But he’d been serious about
not leaving Hildie alone all night—she was camped outside the doorway, gnawing on a chew toy and regarding their progress with friendly curiosity.
David dismissed his brother’s lascivious hopes. “Despite whatever you had in mind, Mom was planning on making sure the two of you slept in separate
rooms until after the wedding—”
“Three more days!”
“—so look at this as a way to burn off your physical frustration in the meantime.”
“I’ve long passed physical frustration and am headed into physical exhaustion,” his brother groused good-naturedly. “Moving the guest room furniture into
the garage and all this stuff out of the garage…You really think Rachel will be surprised? I’d do anything in the world for Lilah, but she would have found the
boxes by now. She has present radar. She stumbles over things I’ve hidden away even when she’s not purposely looking for them. Trying to keep her from
finding her engagement ring early was a comedy of errors.”
David shook his head. “Rachel rarely ever goes into the garage, especially in the winter.” The space was too cramped for them to park cars inside, and
had become little more than a storage facility for lawn and maintenance tools—it had been the perfect spot to hide the boxes for a few days. Even if
Rachel had ventured out for a better look, she would have seen a neatly stacked row of cardboard, all taped up and full of parts and pieces that required
assembly.
He grinned at all they’d managed to accomplish in just one night, trying to imagine her face when he showed her. “For future reference, Tanner, I owe you
a beer.”
“Ha! I was thinking a keg.” But his brother was smiling, too. “As long as Rachel loves it, that’s enough for me.”
David couldn’t agree more. This was going to be the best Christmas ever.
RACHEL FELT warm and contentedly cocooned in the dreams she’d been having, but her senses were starting to provide solid motivation for waking up,
too. The alluring scent of baking cinnamon rolls, for instance. And she was aware of the gentlest, coaxing pressure…She returned the light kiss as she
opened her eyes, waking in David’s embrace.
He sat on the bed, smiling. “Merry Christmas.”
She sleepily returned the smile, then remembered where she was and glanced around. “Where’s everyone else?”
“Arianne’s helping Mom with breakfast, which is nearly ready, and I think Tanner dragged Lilah off in search of mistletoe. He was pitiful last night. The way
he carried on, you’d think they were separated for weeks on end instead of a few hours.”
Rachel stretched, grinning nostalgically. “I remember the days before our wedding when I was sleeping under the same roof as my parents, only I couldn’t
sleep because I was thinking of you.”
“Yeah?” David stroked his hand over her face. “What kind of thoughts?”
“Hey!” Arianne called from the hallway. “If all you happy couples think you’re gonna get fed, I demand help in the kitchen.”
Pulling herself into a sitting position, Rachel laughed. “Your sister is really going to have to learn to be assertive and ask for what she wants.”
“Yeah, well, it’s hard, being the baby of the family and a girl,” David deadpanned. “Tanner and I probably sheltered her too much. I blame myself for her
crippling shyness.”
Rachel was still shaking her head and chuckling when she walked away to brush her teeth. She smiled at her own reflection in the mirror. Hard to believe
that cheerful, beautiful woman was really her. If anyone had asked her a month ago, she would have said this was her last holiday with the Waide family,
probably her last holiday as a Waide. She would have expected it to be tinged with melancholy if not outright grim. She’d never been so thrilled to be so
wrong.
The biggest improvement might be her and David trying to reconnect, but it wasn’t the only improvement.
In weeks past, she’d been trying to decide if she could be truly happy here, in a slow-paced job and in a small community where people would probably
always see her first and foremost as David’s wife with no real picture of who she’d been before. But after calling South Carolina last night to wish her own
family happy holidays and hearing how stressed they all sounded—Kate having only returned to her job from maternity leave a few months ago and now
worried about balancing her career with two small children, Rachel’s father still pushing himself as hard as ever and refusing to consider retirement, her
mother still obsessing over office politics (“First it was the sexism and having to prove myself among the Boys’ Club, now it’s making sure these new
young girls they hire don’t make the rest of us obsolete”)…Well, it was easy to remember why Rachel had dropped out of that particular rat race and
sought the sanctuary of this sleepy town.
Folks in Mistletoe might be overly interested in her life, but it was by and large legitimate interest, not just judging her by her portfolio or whether she was
on track for a promotion. Rachel had never truly disliked her job at the print shop. She’d just started overanalyzing it because she’d wanted to feel that she
was in control of something, because she’d so desperately needed to be excited about something in her life. But both her parents had tried to find their
satisfaction at the office for years, and neither seemed to have succeeded.
She patted her tummy, looking down. “And then there’s you.” She could not wait to see everyone’s faces when she and David made the announcement
later.
When she finally joined the others in the kitchen, Tanner harassed her about women taking a long time in the bathroom, and Arianne playfully accused her
of ducking breakfast chores. Only David glanced at her with worry, raising an eyebrow in silent question and miming being queasy. It took her a moment
to figure out what he was doing, and she laughed at how ridiculous he looked. She’d unintentionally discovered that her competitive husband would
probably be lousy at charades.
I’m fine, she mouthed.
To everyone else taking their seats around the table, she said, “Sorry I was late. I stopped and took a few minutes to…count my blessings. A list that
definitely included all of you.” After a month of her emotions being so close to the surface, she shouldn’t be so caught off guard by the way her vision
suddenly blurred with unshed tears.
Susan looked startled but touched by the declaration. “What an absolutely lovely thing to say, dear. You know we love you, too. I think it would be
appropriate if we all said something we were grateful for this year. I’ll start. I’m the luckiest woman in Mistletoe to have all three of my grown children home
and gathered around me for the holidays.”
Next to her, Zachariah nodded. “I’m grateful the store had another profitable year and grateful for the work my family put in to help make that happen.
David, I haven’t once second-guessed turning the reins over to you, and I know you’ll do great things.”
Tanner kissed Lilah’s hand. “I’m thankful this one hasn’t come to her senses yet and realized she could do better than me.”
A ripple of laughter went around the table, and Lilah’s eyes twinkled when she added, “I’m grateful the wedding dress still fits—I had my doubts after some
of the buffets at Christmas parties we attended. But I officially picked it up yesterday and it was just as perfect as ever. I’m incredibly grateful that, in three
more days, I will become Mrs. Lilah Waide.”
“I’m grateful I got that waiter’s number at the club we took Lilah to,” Arianne said smugly. “Well, we don’t all have to go for the sap, do we? I figure
everyone else has got the cheesy covered.”
David’s voice was so soft that Rachel wondered if anyone else heard him when he said, “I’m grateful for fresh starts.”
Her heart squeezed.
He cleared his throat, setting his hand atop hers on the table. “Rachel, do you want to…?”
Now? She hadn’t really thought about when they’d make their announcement, but David was smiling at her eagerly, obviously ready. Why not? Everyone
was together, and it did seem like a perfect moment.
She took a deep breath, lacing her fingers with his. “Well, there is one new blessing that I—we—wanted to share with you. David and I are, um…” The
tears fell then as if the happiness inside her body was too big to contain and it was seeking any physical outlet. She swiped at the dampness on her
cheeks, nearly laughing aloud with sheer joy. She probably looked as if she’d come unhinged. “I’m pregnant! Dr. McDermott says everything looks good
so far, and we’re expecting a baby this summer.”
Squeals and exclamations erupted around the table, and Rachel thought Arianne did a credible job of looking surprised. Chairs creaked as everyone got
up to hug everyone else. Zachariah’s eyes were misty with emotion when he embraced her. Susan was sobbing hard enough to rival Rachel herself.
After getting her hug, Lilah bounced around the room declaring, “I knew it. I knew it! Oh, this is the best news ever. Just think, Ari, by the time you get
married, your niece or nephew will probably be old enough to serve as an adorable ring bearer or flower girl.”
Arianne snorted. “If I get married, we’re eloping to Vegas, but thanks for thinking of me.”
RACHEL SNUGGLED against David’s side, closing her eyes and listening to the classic movie everyone else was watching. It had been such a wonderful day
she didn’t want it to end, but she was bone-tired. For as delicious as Susan’s roast turkey and white cheddar mashed potatoes had been, they weren’t
exactly energizing foods. If her body felt this heavy and languid now, Rachel couldn’t begin to fathom what the third trimester would be like.
“I should get you home.” David kissed the top of her head. “You look ready to drop, and I’ll bet Winnie’s animals would appreciate getting dinner.”
Rachel nodded her consent, then exchanged goodbyes with everyone. They’d all be together again the day after tomorrow for the wedding rehearsal and
dinner. Tanner had two friends driving up together from Atlanta for the ceremony, but most of the bride’s and groom’s relatives were local.
Outside, Rachel paused long enough to appreciate the clear night sky and hundreds of stars winking at her as if they were all in on a private joke. “It’s
beautiful.”
David smiled. “You’re just stalling because you don’t have the energy to walk the rest of the way to the car.”
“That obvious?”
He shifted the packages he carried for both of them and put his free arm around her. “Thank you for one of the best Christmases of my life.”
She laughed. “Even with the lame presents I got you?” At a desperate loss shopping this year, she’d landed on a boxed set of CDs from a band he liked
and a bottle of his favorite cologne, which was practically a gift to her since she loved leaning close and inhaling the scent.
“I had everything I wanted today,” he told her as he stashed boxes and gift bags in the trunk.
“Well, thank you for my present.” She’d been delighted by the digital camera. It was a truly thoughtful gift, with a much higher megapixel count than her last
one, a sophisticated zoom function and the ability to take black-and-white or sepia-toned shots. They’d taken a few test shots today, but she was looking
forward to reading through the instructions when she was more alert, and really giving it a workout at the rehearsal, wedding and reception. She already
had an idea for a set of nostalgic pictures she could do for the chamber of commerce using the sepia option.
David started the car. “Actually, I have one other thing to give you. At the house.”
Her lips twitched. “Is that your idea of a come-on line?”
“No.” He laughed at her. “I really do have another present waiting for you at the house. Tanner and I set it up last night while you were at Mom and Dad’s.”
“Oh.” That sounded big. She wondered what it could be, but her curiosity wasn’t enough to keep her awake.
The motion of the car, the white noise of the engine and the road beneath them lulled her to sleep, but it was only a short ride and she woke a few minutes
later, more groggy than refreshed. Would David’s feelings be hurt if she asked to postpone unwrapping her second present until tomorrow?
Oh, don’t be a killjoy, she chided herself. Christmas came only once a year, and he was obviously excited. She could prop herself up long enough to
appreciate whatever it was he’d done for her.
Inside the house, he flipped on the hallway light and turned to her with a huge smile. “This way.”
After a second, she realized he was leading her toward the guest room. Intrigued, she hid a yawn behind her hand and followed. What was he up to? He
walked through the doorway first, but spun to face her so quickly she almost bumped into him.
“Ta-da!” David spread his arms proudly.
She was so stunned at what she was seeing that it took a moment for reality to register. They were standing in a baby nursery. If it wasn’t fully furnished, it
was darn close. A white wooden crib, changing table and bookshelf were all assembled and set in place. Brightly colored curtains matched the rainbow
comforter and mobile of primary-colored fuzzy shapes.
The world slipped out from under her. Rachel felt as though she were standing on the deck of a ship that was about to capsize; she even reached out for
something to anchor herself, but the only thing within grasp was David himself. All those wonderful possibilities, gone in one fell swoop. She let her arms
fall back to her sides. A familiar feeling was welling in her.
After everything the two of them had been through during the past few months, he still didn’t get it.
“Speechless, huh?” He beamed. He moved to the side so she could get a better view of everything. “And here Tanner was worried you might find out, that
it wouldn’t be a surprise.”
“Tanner,” she repeated.
David trailed his hand over the crib railing, looking impossibly pleased with himself. “I couldn’t have done it without him. At least not under these time
constraints.”
You shouldn’t have done it without me. But she bit her tongue, not wanting to lash out, not when they’d been so close…
“So?” He stood there expectantly, waiting for gushing praise. While she struggled to find words, choking on despair, he prompted her as clearly as a
drama teacher cuing a nervous student onstage. “It looks great, doesn’t it? Works for either a boy or a girl, with all the cheery red, blue, yellow and green.
You see we put up a switch plate and that wallpaper border halfway down the wall. If you want, we can paint the trim, too. That might be pretty. Really
dresses up the room without painting it all some pastel color we’d have to cover later.”
The trim. Her mind was working furiously, one part of her brain pointing out that he’d put a lot of effort into this. He thought he’d done a nice thing. But the
rest of her was enraged. She was carrying a baby she’d wanted for the past three years. She’d read parenting magazines cover to cover, thumbed
through consumer rating reports and cut out pictures of baby paraphernalia—and David didn’t think she’d want any more input on the nursery than what
color to paint the trim? An aborted scream caught in her throat.
“There’s a rocker on back order,” he continued, oblivious. “It doesn’t match exactly, it’s a blond wood, but the cushion will work with what we used in here
—”
“By we, I assume you mean you and Tanner?”
He started, seeming perplexed that she wasn’t turning cartwheels of joy. “Well…yeah. You’re not mad because I told him about the baby a couple of days
early, are you? Because I did this for you.”
For her, not with her. Crucial difference. “I know, David. Th-thank you.” Squeezing her eyes shut, she struggled to pull the sentences from her tired brain
that would finally make him hear her. She rubbed her temples. “But I had thought that, once we were living together again, if we were living together again,
we could…that we would—Were you just assuming that everything would revert to the way it used to be after Winnie got home from the cruise?”
“Well, that was definitely my hope,” he said carefully. “Come on, Rachel, I love you. You love me. I know you do!” Possibly not the best way for him to argue
his case right now, telling her how she felt.
“We’re dating right now,” she reminded him. “Taking it slowly?” Or had he just been humoring her?
He sighed, shifting his weight. “If it’s that important to you, I can get an apartment. Give you your space for a little while. I could stay at Tanner’s place if it’s
really necessary. I’d already decided that if you and I weren’t together, you and the baby should take the house, anyway.”
Her blood pressure soared. “If you and I didn’t stay together, don’t you think it should be my decision where I lived? You can’t make those choices for me,
especially not without even consulting me.”
“But you already said you’d stay in Mistletoe until at least the birth, maybe longer. It just makes sense for you to stay here,” he argued, regarding her as if
she were mentally unstable. “Hell, I got this place for you!”
“That’s right!” Inwardly, she flinched at her own raised voice, but she couldn’t seem to calm herself enough to get her volume back under control. “For me,
with no input from me whatsoever.”
“Well, that would have spoiled the surprise. I knew you’d love this house. And I was right, wasn’t I?”
There was no sane way for her to explain that, at the moment, his being right—again—was more a liability than asset. Just as she was at a loss to explain
how he could be right and dead wrong at the same time.
“We had been looking for houses on my weekends here,” she reminded him, thinking of Lilah and Tanner, building their home, trading opinions on
everything from light fixtures to the welcome mat. A surge of envy pierced her. “Together.”
“But we hadn’t found any we loved. This met all your qualifications, and I knew it wouldn’t stay on the market long at that asking price!”
All valid points. However, it made it difficult to connect with her husband when, every time she tried to explain her feelings, he cut her off with logical
arguments instead of understanding what she was trying to share.
“Rachel, if you didn’t like the house, why didn’t you say so four years ago?”
If she’d spoken up the moment he proudly handed her the keys—the way she was trying to speak up now—would it have set a different tone for their
marriage? “Because I did like the house. You were right, of course. It’s perfect for us, so it seemed childish to whine, ‘But I wanted to help pick it out.’ Only
now it’s four years later, and half the time I feel like a part-time consultant on my own life, with you making unilateral decisions. I wish sometimes that
instead of my moving to Mistletoe, where you already had a life established, we’d moved to a neutral location where we could build a life together from the
ground up. Because—”
“You love Mistletoe! You always have.” He scowled at her, equal parts angry and confused.
Some days more than others. But this wasn’t about the town. She was trying to explain her feelings about them. “Damn it, David! Could you please just
listen? I feel…extraneous. I daydreamed about brainstorming nursery themes with you,” she blurted, tears rising. “Looking through catalogs, discussing
baby names…Unless you’ve already picked out one of those, too?”
“Don’t be ridiculous.”
“It’s not ridiculous to me, David. I…” She glanced around again, hating how wrong she’d been, feeling stupid for all that hope she’d been nurturing for the
past week. “I had this image of the two of us, paint smears on our clothes and faces, standing in the middle of a nursery we’d created together.”
“I didn’t think the physical exertion and fumes would be good for you and the baby,” he muttered, intractable. “I’m sorry you don’t like the nursery. I can—”
“No! This isn’t about me being some shrew who doesn’t appreciate her husband’s kind acts. I like surprises. Smaller ones, anyway. This is about your
entrenched mantra of ‘I can.’ David, why isn’t it ever we can?”
She knew she’d ruined the moment he must have been picturing, savoring, while he sweated over furniture assembly and wallpaper paste. She saw the
wounded look deep beneath his rapidly cooling gaze and hated herself a little for putting it there…and hated him a little for putting her in this position. This
was too important for her to nod politely and pretend she was overjoyed. She’d let lots of incidents pass unremarked—if you could call buying an entire
house an “incident”—because they were sweet and she didn’t want to hurt him. But she couldn’t go back to their marriage the way it was. She needed—
she deserved—a partnership.
“You make it sound like I don’t think about you. I did this for you,” David protested.
“If you really thought about me, if you really knew me…For a couple of months, I was unsatisfied at my job, partly because I’d fallen into a rut, partly
because of the subliminal guilt my parents heap on me that I’m not doing anything more ‘important.’ I’ve come to terms with never again having the kind of
salary I gave up, never being an executive or having the type of career other people see as important, but I should feel important in my own house. I should
feel important to you.”
He was furious now, stomping past her as if he couldn’t wait to get out of that room. “I was trying to show you how important you are to me! I go out of my
way to do things like this, to take care of you, to…And your reactions have varied from sullen acknowledgment to outright criticism. Most women would be
thrilled to be married to a guy who thought to send flowers, who surprised them with grand gestures.”
“Then maybe I am not the woman for you!” Her pulse was racing, and she couldn’t believe she’d just yelled that at him. But this was crucial—the point she
was trying to make, this was a deal breaker—and he wasn’t hearing her. Again.
David shot her a look of something perilously close to contempt. “Maybe you’re not.” Then he was gone.
At first she was too stunned to move, but when the front door shut, she sank to the floor, her eyes hot and dry. This felt too big for tears, the gaping hole
that had just been punched through her. She didn’t know why she was so horribly shocked; after all, she’d known they were standing on a fault line and that
one more good-size tremor might be more than their marriage could take at this point.
She just wished she hadn’t been so right about them in November and so wrong about them making the most of their second chance.
Chapter Fifteen
David watched his brother through an invisible wall of cynicism. I don’t remember being this discombobulated at my wedding. Was it because he was a
more inherently organized person, or was there something wrong with him? Had he just not loved Rachel as much as Tanner loved his bride?
No, that was ridiculous. I loved that woman with everything I had in me. Not that it had been enough for her. He’d told himself for months that the reason
he couldn’t make her happy was because she so desperately wanted to get pregnant that nothing else could make her happy. Yet here she was, finally
pregnant, and still—
“David, I think I left my cuff links in the car!” Tanner said. “I’m supposed to meet Lilah and the photographer in just a sec. Would you mind…?”
“Of course not.” David easily caught the keys his brother tossed his way. “Stop messing with your tie, bro. It looks fine. I straightened it myself. And for
pity’s sake, take a breath.”
“Right.” Tanner smiled then. “Right, thanks.”
See, had that been so hard? He’d given perfectly sensible advice, which Tanner had recognized and been grateful for. Tanner had not thrown an
incomprehensible fit.
A much nobler part of David, which he’d tried to silence at the rehearsal dinner by sipping Scotch and not looking anywhere near his wife, asked, Is it
really that incomprehensible that she wanted to have a hand in decorating the nursery? But it hadn’t just been that. It hadn’t only been that after his
planning, after his hard work and soliciting Tanner’s help, that Rachel had rejected his gift—had practically thrown it back in his face. (How would she have
felt if Tanner and Lilah had balked at that scrapbook she’d expended so much effort on? Instead, they’d laughed and cried and hugged her. All the
responses he’d envisioned getting from Rachel.) What had chilled David to the core was how easily she’d snapped that maybe she wasn’t the right
woman for him. It had sounded ominously like a threat. He’d recalled with brutal clarity the shock of when she’d left him in November.
Was that how it would be now, the specter of separation hanging over him like a married man’s Sword of Damocles? Would he have to worry that
whenever things got rocky at home, calling it quits would be her go-to solution? He couldn’t put himself through that. And what about after their child was
born? Kids deserved a stable environment.
David’s righteous anger lasted from the walk at the back of the church, all the way to the front steps. As he descended toward the parking lot, Zachariah’s
car stopped at the bottom of the stairs, and Arianne and Rachel got out. Apparently there had been a hold-up at the hairdresser’s earlier. Lilah herself had
arrived later than scheduled, her nerves frazzled when she reached the church.
The hairdresser might have been slow, but she’d done an amazing job with Rachel, whose black hair had grown so long in the past year—a result, she’d
speculated, of the prenatal vitamins. Now, it was up in some kind of pretty twist, tendrils curling down around her face here and there. Her makeup was
smoky and soft, or maybe that was just the pregnancy. He’d noticed the way she was softening more and more lately—well, in general, not with him. Her
voice had been hard at the wedding rehearsal. She’d greeted him with exacting politeness, her gaze as warm as an ice sculpture.
He extended that same cool civility now, nodding as she passed. “Rachel.” As he averted his gaze, though, trying not to notice how fantastic she looked, it
snagged on the top of her dress and the tantalizing view of full, ripe cleavage. That wasn’t appropriate for church! But Arianne and Rachel were already
hurrying past him and his wordless stupor, leaving him behind.
If it weren’t for the fact that he was the best man and took his responsibilities as such very seriously, he would be counting the seconds to the reception
and the open bar.
THE GOOD THING about weddings, Rachel thought as she shifted her weight and tried not to look miserable in front of two hundred and eighty guests, was
that no one thought anything of it if you cried. She’d wondered, as she first walked down the aisle to her position at the front, whether if she didn’t look at
David, she could do this. But watching Tanner and Lilah—and the way they watched each other—made everything even worse.
We had that once. They were both good people, flawed but decent, and they’d loved each other very much. How had they let it go so wrong?
Then the vows had started, almost identical to the ones she and David had exchanged. The “richer and poorer” part had never really been an issue, but
they’d failed spectacularly at the “better or worse” and “in sickness and health.” The promise that really haunted her, though, was “cherish and respect.”
She recalled mood swings she’d had, excuses she’d made for not being intimate with him, days when she’d been so tempted to roll her eyes at his
offering her or someone else advice that she’d forgotten entirely that she used to come to him for advice about everything under the sun.
Had she cherished her husband? She winced guiltily.
David, to give him his due, had tried to cherish her. He’d tried a lot more consistently than she had. But in doing so, time and again he’d failed to respect
her opinions, preferences, her intellect and autonomy. Honestly, how much consideration had he really given to why that nursery set would be the one she
would want the most, the one that was perfect for their child? Had he simply been swept away by the idea of once again sweeping her off her feet? My
husband, the broom. Of course, as he’d so patronizingly pointed out, lots of other women would be grateful that their husbands cared enough to make
sweeping gestures.
Weeks ago, she’d thought miserably that if she had a chance at taking back small moments in her marriage, she’d do it differently. Was her idea of
improvement rejecting something he’d worked hard on, trying to make herself heard at the expense of his feelings? God, what a pair they were. Or
weren’t.
Winnie would be home this week, and Rachel had no idea how she and David would proceed. They had some decisions to make. Unfortunately that
would involve speaking to each other again, if they could trust themselves to have a conversation without yelling this time. Maybe that’s why some people
went to lawyers in the first place, needing that third party. Lawyers. Her heart hurt at the thought.
At the sudden sound of applause, she barely kept herself from jumping. Belatedly, she turned to see Tanner and Lilah presented as husband and wife.
She’d missed the end of the wedding, too distraught over the end of her own marriage.
ZACHARIAH, wearing a tuxedo that matched both of his sons’, clapped David on the arm. “Should have known you’d be over here.”
David jiggled one of the index cards in his hand. “Practicing my speech.”
“That’s what I mean.” Zachariah laughed. “Instead of dancing with that beautiful wife of yours, you’re over here trying to make sure it’s absolutely perfect.
Relax, son, no one’s going to grade you on this.”
David tried to smile, not quite accomplishing his goal. Luckily his father wasn’t looking at him.
The older Waide gestured with his champagne flute toward the dance floor where Tanner and Lilah only had eyes for each other. “They look so happy
together, don’t they? As a parent, that’s all you can wish for your kids.” He smiled back toward David. “I know I wasn’t exactly a relaxed or laid-back role
model, but when this baby comes, try not to sweat the small stuff. You and Rachel keep loving each other and make sure the little one knows how much
he’s loved, and the rest will work itself out.”
David had always respected his dad’s opinion, but that sounded like the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard. The rest will work itself out? Right.
Witness his own happy home. Someone should warn Lilah and Tanner how much work marriage took. Then again, under the right circumstances,
marriages lasted decades, entire lifetimes. That kind of payoff was worth the effort.
I made an effort.
He glanced across the room, saw his mother and Rachel sitting at a table and talking. From his vantage point, he could see that Rachel had kicked off her
high heels and was wiggling her toes. In spite of everything else, the sight made him smile.
He and his wife certainly defined “effort” differently. He thought he’d been making an admirable effort putting together that nursery for her. And she thought
she’d been making an honest effort to improve their relationship by pointing out why she hated that he’d done it. He frowned. Did she have a point?
It wouldn’t make for the wittiest or sexiest reception toast ever, but marriage required compromise. He could tell himself that he’d been working his tail off
—trying to pay her more attention, sending her flowers, giving her space while still being persistent in fighting to salvage their marriage—but what had he
actually compromised?
The question stumped him. Had Rachel ever asked him to give up anything other than sex on the nights she wasn’t in the mood and a few of his more
high-handed ways?
Perhaps—that maddening inner voice was back—if you’d been a little less high-handed, she would have been in the mood a little more.
“David!” Arianne snapped her fingers, and he blinked, startled to find his sister standing in front of him, a worried look on her face. “Were you even
listening to me?”
He was getting that a lot from women these days. “Sorry. What were you saying?”
She pointed to the corner of the room, where tall pieces of white lattice work draped in tulle formed an enclosure around a long table. The wedding cake
and groom’s cake sat next to each other. “They’re going to cut the cake, but first we do our toasts.”
“What’s yours?”
“That I can’t imagine why any woman would willingly live with one of my brothers, but that even knowing what pains you and Tanner are, every time I see all
that happiness shining from Lilah’s face, I get…jealous.”
He couldn’t believe that was actually her maid-of-honor toast, but knowing Arianne, maybe it was.
“Anyway,” she told him, “you go first. If yours is good enough, I’ll just add, ‘what he said,’ and we can get on with the party.”
All of the other members of the bridal party were gathered around the table, including Rachel. People naturally shifted so that he could be closer to his
wife. Her body brushed his, and his entire system heated with wanting her. He could still clearly remember their own wedding—it had been tormenting all
through the ceremony—and how enthusiastically they’d made love throughout their honeymoon. Rachel had lost that enthusiasm in the last year.
Some of that was an understandable side effect of the medications and disappointments, but…was he also to blame? Had David unintentionally made
his wife feel unimportant to him, marginalized?
Tanner nudged him with his elbow. “You’re up. Bang a glass or something.”
David arched an eyebrow. “I’ve got it under control.”
“Good,” Tanner whispered back. “I just want everything to be—”
“Perfect?” David remembered his brother saying the same thing to him a few weeks ago as they shot hoops in their parents’ driveway. At the time, he’d
been tempted to dampen his brother’s unrealistic hopes, but maybe those hopes were every bit as realistic as what a person was willing to invest. There
were no perfect people, but that didn’t mean a man and a woman couldn’t be perfect for each other…as long as they worked for it. And, more important,
worked together.
He held his glass, tapping it lightly with one of the forks he’d grabbed from the cake table. “Hello. I hope you’re all having a wonderful time today—” He
paused unintentionally, worried about Rachel’s emotional state. She couldn’t possibly be having a wonderful time. Had she been reliving the same
memories as him during the ceremony?
“On behalf of my brother and his beautiful bride, thank you for joining us to celebrate their union.” He waited while good-natured applause and hurrahs
erupted across the room. Then he glanced at the index card in his hand, and, meeting Rachel’s gaze, crumpled the paper.
Her eyebrows rose as he shoved it back in his pocket, but he didn’t think anyone else noticed.
“I had a speech all written out, full of brotherly advice about what it takes to make a good marriage, but what do I know?”
Rachel paled, as if he’d suddenly lost his mind and was about to announce to the entire town that his own marriage was a sham.
He gave her a bittersweet smile. “Because the truth is, marriage is a learning process and the very best person to teach you is your partner.” And I’m
sorry for all the times I made you feel like less than an equal partner, he wanted to tell her. It was difficult to keep his voice even. “Tanner and Lilah, you
may be surprised at how much you have to learn about each other, stuff you thought you already knew, how even when you think you’re getting it right…”
What kind of husband was he? Why had it been more important to explain to Rachel why he was right than just to listen to her explanations about the
effect his actions were having on her?
For that matter, what kind of brother was he? He’d trailed off in the middle of what was shaping up to be the worst best man’s toast of all time.
Rachel stepped forward, suddenly grabbing his hand and smiling. “The beauty of a good relationship is all the new things you’ll continue to learn about
each other and about yourselves. Celebrate those surprises, celebrate your differences and celebrate the ways you learn to work around them to become
an even stronger couple. We wish you many, many years of happiness and lots of love. Cheers!”
Feeling suddenly overwhelmed in front of all those people, including the one who mattered most to him, and as if he were suffocating behind his bow tie,
David barely made it through Arianne’s quick, irreverent toast and the resulting laughter before he ducked around the corner of the makeshift wall. The
back door was only a few steps beyond, and he slipped outside as surreptitiously as possible, feeling guilty for making an escape. He should have at
least stayed long enough to thank Rachel for intervening, bringing his mangled monologue to a graceful close.
“Hey,” she said quietly from behind him.
Well, here was his chance. Seated on the top concrete stair, he looked over his shoulder. “Thank you for saving my butt in there.”
She came closer, joining him on the step but leaving a careful gap between them. “I was afraid you’d be embarrassed that I cut in. Knowing you, you
would have regrouped brilliantly all by yourself in another moment or two.”
“Brilliantly?” he scoffed. “You must not have been listening.”
“Oh, I was.” She cocked her head, her gaze almost a caress. “I…I think I heard what you were trying to say quite well, actually.”
“You are definitely the better listener of the two of us.” He wanted to reach for her hand but hesitated. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry if it took you yelling or saying
goodbye for me to hear you.”
Her lower lip trembled, and she bit down on it.
“Rach. Don’t cry.” He pulled her into a hug, his own eyes damp. “Please don’t cry. I’m so sorry.”
She glanced up, her eyes round with surprise. “You’re crying.”
He sniffed, casting about for something to say. “It doesn’t count unless the tears actually get out of your eyes. Man rules.”
“Ah.” She smiled, and the sight of it was like every Christmas present in the world rolled into one. He wanted to be on the receiving end of those smiles for
the next hundred years or so.
“I need you,” he blurted. “Don’t leave me.”
Her jaw dropped. “David.” She launched herself into his arms, pulling him closer and covering his face with kisses.
“That’s the most incredible thing you’ve ever said to me,” she whispered.
And then they were kissing each other so fervently that neither of them said anything for a long time after.
When they finally stopped to catch their breath, he promised, “I’ll try to do better.”
“It’s not just you,” she told him. “Lord knows there are ways I could be a better wife. You’ve done so many wonderful things for me, and I should appreciate
you more. I should take into consideration the intentions as well as the actions.”
“I’ll try to stop acting so much without getting your input first. So we’ll work on the ‘better,’” David resolved. “And consider the ‘worse’ behind us?”
She nodded, her eyes red-rimmed, tear tracks streaked through her makeup, her professionally arranged hairstyle destroyed by his plunging fingers.
She’d never looked more radiant.
“I love you,” he told her.
“I love you, too.” She wiped her cheeks. “I’m sorry it’s not easier.”
“Nothing worth having is. And you are definitely worth it, Mrs. Waide.”
She blushed, which he found inexplicably arousing. Then again, he’d been aroused since her mouth had touched his.
“Think we should go back inside?” Rachel asked.
“Probably.” He grinned at her. “But I’d much rather go somewhere and have my way with you.”
She tilted her head up, the sun catching the glint in her gaze as she clucked her tongue at him. “You know, I’ve heard about boys like you.”
“And?”
She traced her index finger over his bottom lip. “And I think you’re absolutely perfect for a girl like me.”
Smiling in agreement, David kissed his bride.